I’m super excited to work together with you on this extraordinary journey that is personal development. You will find many articles online telling you how to be more productive, to be happier and so on, but I believe that to be truly successful and live our life to the fullest, it all starts with our mindset. The key to success is our ability to control our thoughts and master our psychology; everything else is a by-product of that process. If you can do that, you will open the doors to success, love, money, wealth and everything you have ever been dreaming of.
Thus, rather than simply writing articles on various topics about personal development, I would like you to let me be your guide in your quest towards self-improvement, through different steps that I believe are essential for those who want to learn how to unleash their true potential.
If you look at successful people, you will find that they don’t necessarily come from well-off families and many are actually self-made men coming from various backgrounds. Most of them are not smarter than you or me. Then, what makes them successful? I believe that the number one reason is their mindset. If we are really determined to live an extraordinary life, developing a mindset for success is a MUST! So how do you do that?H
Understanding Your Limiting Beliefs
First, all human beings have limiting beliefs, that is, false beliefs that are the result of their environment and that they hold as true. For instance, some people believe that money is evil and that rich people are all corrupted. Other believe that they are not smart enough, not strong enough, not confident enough, that they are not talented enough or that they are not coming from the right background. All those beliefs are difficult to change, firstly because we might not be aware of them and of the profound impact they have on us, secondly because they are located deep down in our subconscious and thus cannot be accessed easily. However, learning how to overcome limiting beliefs is essential.
There is No Skills You Cannot Learn
People who can get rid of most of their limiting beliefs will gradually realize that the only obstacle that prevents them from being successful is themselves. In reality, we all have more or less the same brain. Thousands of thousands of people of average intelligence have accomplished great things throughout history. It is not because they are talented, it is because they kept learning and learning throughout their entire life and developed the skills they needed to accomplish what they accomplished. I believe that too many people are overrating talent and use it as an excuse for their inaction. I don’t know where you are now, and how far you are from where you want to be, but you should understand that any skill you need to acquire in order to close the gap between where you are and where you want to be can be acquired. There is absolutely no limit with what you can learn. You can learn to be charismatic, confident, attractive, persistent, disciplined, happier, compassionate, positive, curious, grateful… Absolutely anything. And all the knowledge is available out there!
I believe that we have all amazing capacities, but unfortunately many people are not aware of how much they could accomplish if only they were clear about what they really want in life and consistently develop plans of action to achieve their goals. Most people spend more time planning about their next vacation as they are trying to escape their job than planning their ideal life and working on it. Do you have your goals written for this week? This month? This year? Did you set specific and measurable goals for your health, your career, your relationships or your finance for the coming years? We will discuss in details about the importance of setting goals in further articles as it is one of the key to success.
The Beginning of My Journey
When I really start working hard on myself was about three years ago. I was studying hard but I wasn’t really working hard on myself and was avoiding my real problems. I actually started by doing research on internet on how to be more confident with girls. I had always been shy and afraid to take any action at school, at work or more generally in social interactions. As I was reading books written by “pick-up artist” I realized the importance of limiting beliefs.
For instance, I used to think that such or such girls was too pretty for me, but just by deciding that this was total bullshit and that no girls was too pretty for me, I began to attract girls that i would have considered “too pretty” for me. The only thing that had changed was my mindset but it lead to a change of attitude, which lead to a change of behavior.
By now, I hope you begin to understand how limiting beliefs can hold you back in your life. They often lead to self-fulfilling prophecy. If you believe that you are not smart enough, what are the chances that you will take action to develop yourself and move towards your dreams. Actually, even if you were to take action you will probably fail. Why? Because you will use the slightest setback as a way to justify you are a failure: “See, I failed. I’m a total loser” and you will sabotage yourself. That’s why it is essential to be aware of our limiting beliefs.
Exercise: Positive Brainwashing
As a first step, I would like you to spend two weeks just getting familiar with the mindset and the philosophy that is required to start the process of personal development. All the limited beliefs we hold are the result of a constant exposure to certain ideas over a long period of time. It is no so different to what happens in certain religious sects where gurus brainwash you until you believe what they want you to believe. One very important thing to know about our subconscious mind is that it cannot distinguish between what is true and what is not. As a result, it will accept whatever you feed it with.
I would like you to reverse the process by doing what I called “positive brainwashing”, that is to make sure that you are exposed to positive and empowering ideas every single day. For the next two weeks what I would like you to do is to start your day by spending at least 30 minutes reading inspiring materials, listening to inspiring audiobooks or watching motivational videos. I personally watch motivational videos or listen to inspiring audiobooks every single day while I’m preparing and eating my breakfast.
Motivational videos can be more powerful than people might think if you discipline yourself to watch them everyday. After a while, you are likely to find some particular words or expressions that will resonate within you and you will find yourself repeating those expressions to yourself when facing difficult times. We will see later other tools you can apply to change your mindset and adopt a more positive attitude.
During the first stage of my journey towards personal growth where I work on becoming more confidence around women, I discovered the power of psychology and how changing our mind affect our attitude as well as the way people react to us.
In the second stage, I further worked on my attitude and was greatly influenced by the following audiobooks that I highly recommend you: The Art of Exceptional Living
Alternatively, you might want to read, As a Man Thinketh by James Allen, which is about how our thoughts shape our life. The Kindle version is free and the paperback version costs only $3.
You can also listen to various motivational videos on Youtube. Here are some recommendations:
http://youtu.be/PWUftpAMy0Y
http://youtu.be/e2ap6fd_sXY
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Thank you very much for the article! It inspired me to download a bunch of motivational videos and put them on my phone, so I can listen to them in the morning before even getting out of bed… 😀
Hey Max, thanks for your comment. Great idea 😉
Still listening to Jim Rohn?
Great article! I’ve known for a long time that I’m my own worst enemy, but I’ve never really challenged myself to do anything about it. Thank you for throwing down the gauntlet, so to speak, and challenging me to overcome my self-limiting beliefs. I may not be entirely successful at reading or watching videos first thing in the morning, but I will do it as early in the morning as possible. (I get up at 4:30 a.m. on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday to work out at the gym with my husband, and I’m not sure about getting up at 4:00 a.m.!)
Thanks Betty. That’s fine if you cannot watch videos first thing in the morning. Just, watch them whenever you can. I used to listen to Jim Rohn’s audiobook as much as I could doing some “positive brainwashing!”
I admire your dedication. Not many people can wake up at 4:30 to go to the gym!